This is a post I’ve been thinking about writing for the last week or so. As you may know, I’m not really one for revealing anything too personal on here, but I thought this topic might be of some use. So here goes…
I’ve decided to come off the pill.
Okay, hold your horses before you start jumping to conclusions! This choice has had nothing to do with babies – soz mum! But after almost eight years of taking the pill, I felt like my body could do with a well overdue hormone break. It has actually been something I’ve considered doing for well over a year, but the fear of bad skin, weight gain and erratic periods has kept me from making the change. To understand why I have so much fear over this decision, I think you may need a little back-story…
I first started taking the pill when I was 17. Prior to that I’d never really had any major skin troubles and my periods were as regular as clockwork. I then decided to come when I turned 21 as quick way to lose weight – I was off to Ibiza in 6 weeks and it was a case of desperate pound shifting measures! It was then that all my troubles started. My skin took a turn for worse, I started to gain weight rapidly and strangest of all, I never got my period. After 12 month and a series of visits to the doctor that I finally got a diagnosis… I had polycystic ovary syndrome or PCOS for short.
For those of you (like me at the time), who haven’t a clue what PCOS is, then let me briefly explain. Essentially it is a condition whereby your hormone levels are all out of sync. This imbalance leads to cysts growing on your ovaries, which in turn can end up playing havoc with your menstrual cycle, skin, weight and potentially your fertility. So all in all, not exactly ideal. So taking the advice of the Doc, I went back on the pill to help control my hormones. Sure enough my periods returned, my skin problems faded away and my weight returned to normal.
So why the hell would I want to come off the pill?
Having been back on the pill for around five years, I was starting to see some seriously negative side effects.
The major issue was my negative outlook on life. I’d gone from being a laid back, fairly positive person, to what only can be described as a miserable sod. Looking back at this year and considering the amount of amazing things that have happened to me, I just couldn’t understand why I was constantly feeling so fed up and dissatisfied. The smallest things at work would send me into floods of tears, I was constantly feeling that nothing I had or did was good enough and perhaps worst of all, I started to emotionally distance myself from the ones I love.
And if all of that wasn’t bad enough, then there were the constant sugar cravings, the inability to never feel full and a lovely collection of headaches just before and just after a period. Now I know that not all of these effects may have been totally down to the pill, but without ever coming off again, how could I truly know? So I decided that I could no longer let the fear of what happened last time, stop me from ever coming off the pill again.
A month later and here I am. Within just a week of not taking the pill, that unpleasant grey cloud had sailed away and I’ve begun to feel happy again. Sounds weird to say, but I’d almost forgotten what that felt like! And most exciting of all, a few days ago I got my period and just like old times, it was right on schedule.
If you’re considering coming off the pill, keep your eyes peeled as I’ll have a new post up very soon talking more about the effects and changes I’ve noticed since coming off the pill.